Mother's Day

I was reminded yesterday by one of my readers that it's days like today where you live by the philosophy - one foot in front of the other and as an old friend used to tell me, "you just have to keep walking forward". Mother's Day is definitely challenging for me, as it has only been the second without my mom, and I can imagine the same for other friends/family members who have experienced the same loss. The hallmark cards, endless Facebook posts, and wonderful things that all mothers deserve...is hard for someone to see who has lost their own mother. Every time I go into Hallmark In the mall, the older lady asks me... does your mother have a hallmark rewards card? In my head I'm thinking - Lady are you KIDDING ME....but I kindly say no, as she has no idea and I am way too nice to hurt her feelings. It's the little things though... that get you.

 I can't imagine it ever getting easier, but I think you learn how to cope differently and manage your emotions in a way where you just keep going. One of my best friends bought me a book called, Motherless Daughter, shortly after my mom passed. I still have not mustered up the courage to read it...but have finally taken it out to begin that journey and soul searching process. People often ask me, do you do anything special for your mom on mother's day since she has passed? The answer is no... because she is always in my thoughts and honestly it's too hard to do something, still. I can't imagine having a little ceremony or doing anything like that - and maybe it's different for everyone, but for me...I'm just not there yet, and I think it's ok that way.